To Practice

Meditation isn’t the absence of thought. You aren’t failing if you aren’t still. Meditation is the practice of returning to focus. Learning to deal with noise. Letting thoughts flow through you without fighting them. You can do that, in part, by returning to five simple points. Proper exercise, breathing, diet, relaxation, and mental health. I have been doing Yoga for 13 years, and much of that time has not been in the traditional “yoga class" sense. I did do two one-month-long teacher training courses which were amazing and protected (a real opportunity to completely focus on my own health), but reality is more challenging. My yoga now mainly consists of rocking my daughter to sleep, or walking with her in the local forest. Finding 90 minutes to bend and stretch is more challenging. My yoga practice now includes detaching from daily investment price moves! From not seeing work challenges as Trevor challenges. From believing that the problem is the problem. Taking a breath and nudging away at a solution. Yoga comes in many forms. The form I choose is via Saraswati (Learning and Creativity). Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi’s concept of “Flow”. Engaging in ways that are challenging enough to grab my attention (not bored), but not so far beyond my skill level to create anxiety and worry. Still I dip into worry, and anxiety, and my practice has to be to constantly come out of that. To gain comfort with discomfort. To practice.

A Hamsa (Swan) sits at Saraswati's feet

Wrestling with Ideas

A good idea is not enough. Bringing a thought to reality is a complex coordination problem that requires time, resources, and connection. I have wrestled long and hard with my inner idealist and pragmatist. Learning which battles to pick. Learning the art of silence. Learning when good intent actually escalates conflict. Learning when there is no need or value in defending myself or my beliefs. And when there is. I find it interesting that in stories of the old sages, the wise old hermits that get consulted seldom do more than ask ambiguous questions. As if those who know the most are those who see the humour in it all. In my utopia, my understanding of the world is not forced on others. I am an anarchist in that way. My ideal relationships are peer to peer. But I am not submissive, and am resistant to those who wish to dominate without consent. A dance between protecting my good ideas, and letting them go enough for them to influence reality.

 

Making your Jam

I buy many of the stronger arguments about eating less meat, and so am slowly changing my habits. I also buy the argument that we have a quota of self-discipline. There are no brownie points for martyrs and ideologues. Actions are what matter, so deep pragmatism is the most effective path. By definition. My approach has been to gently expand my vocabulary (the foods my tongue recognises) and sentences (the foods I can cook). Addition is the best form of breaking of control. If I look forward to vegetarian dishes, I don’t feel hard done by, by the missing meat. I now love making soup and jams… and experimenting. My meat consumption has gone down. Similarly, I think the way to unwind our identity problems (Nations, Companies, Prejudice) is competition. Start seeing yourself in more places till those places become a part of you. We are a collection of our habits, and our habits build from the words and sentences we attach meaning to and build meaning from.