Social Intelligence

I just finished Daniel Goleman's Social Intelligence. He is better known for his earlier books on Emotional Intelligence.

I haven't read the first book, but did sit through a work course based on it a few years back. While Emotional intelligence is all about self-awareness and self-management, the book on Social Intelligence looks at social awareness. The thrust is about empathy and the ability to understand how best to interact. He is rather critical of technology and I think he thinks the world used to be much better at communicating.

I recognise that technology does risk submersing people and can damage relationships, e.g. where you get sucked into games and replace human interaction with that. However, I actually think the way technology is moving is in the right direction. Social Media and lots of the exciting new technologies are all about communication. Instead of sitting in front of a TV being shouted at, people are building their home pages, writing blogs, letting people know what they are up to, finding out about the world and creating opportunity for better social awareness and empathy. I can't help but feel the new technologies help create more opportunities for better 'real-life' social interactions through the creation of interest groups and the exchange of ideas. People still want to meet up with each other just like nothing beats live music or sport.

In the book he talks about being aware of when you are treating people as objects rather than social emotional beings. He discusses happiness and approaches to emotional well being. He looks at differences between the sexes, and at the physical side effects of emotional responses. He also has a similar concept to Haidt's Inner Elephant (Emotional Response) in the form of 'Low Road Responses' and Haidt's Rider (Rational Response) in the form of 'High Road Responses'.

That idea appeals to me. I like that you can train your elephant to alter the behaviours that you recognise are inconsistent with what you rationally want. I also think that provides a barrier to your rational responses which aren't always clear. I think there are some things that it doesn't matter how hard you try to train your elephant, your elephant will refuse. Maybe in those cases the elephant is right?

Anyway, I think a fuller discussion of and recognition of social and emotional intelligence is of vital importance in an age of ideas. In the work place for example, I think the ability to communicate clearly and your degree of social intelligence far outweighs the need for IQ (beyond some basic level).