Reframing

Reframing my internal conversation by “thinking in paths” opened things up for me, and allowed me to participate in the chanting in yoga. In yoga, the chants aren’t about the literal meaning of the words/sounds. The sounds themselves are intended to connect you to the world. 

In a non-yogic sense, this made sense to me. One of my favourite TED talks is by Jill Bolte Taylor, where she (as a brain scientist) describes her first hand experience of a stroke. She describes the bit of the brain that allows you to realise that you are separate from everything else. She describes how her stroke stilled that part, and how she had a magical moment where she felt deeply connected to everything and everyone. Which is basically what yoga is about. Our interpretation of reality is both the way we connect to people, and what separates us from people. 

I had fond memories of all the songs and singing at church even though I didn’t believe the words. I like the sound of the Sanskrit chants and I was able to use the music rather than thinking about it. That allowed me to go deeper into my yoga rather than feeling like a spectator because of a niggle. I was working long hours. I would get home from work just before the yoga class started at 8pm. After the 90 minute class, I would finish the day with some yogi soup.

Frame Makers

And Again

Not eating or sleeping properly can catch up on you. Short-term resilience can hide the long-term damage you are doing to your endurance. 

You need to deal with the patterns of ups and downs and recognise natural rhythms respectfully. Your body is a vehicle that allows you to think clearly. You won’t be able to still the waves of your thoughts if your body is crying out. 

Niggles, knots in your muscles, and points of tension are what stop you from doing what you should be doing. That is when scarcity of attention kicks in. You get big, muscular, sportsmen coming into yoga classes, who (forget touching their toes) can hardly brush their teeth because of the size of their distorted biceps. 

You need awareness of how everything is connected, and to regularly move in a way that reminds your body of its options and tools. It’s a long-term game. Real wealth, and real meaning, gets created through commitment and consistency. 

A long timeframe shifts your reality. Single decisions get taken in context of their broad framing. Instead of all your energy being sucked into one choice with life-or-death outcomes. Where getting it wrong is debilitatingly frightening. Endurance is the bedrock for the confidence to be creative. 

It has to be okay to be wrong, because being wrong is the only way to learn. Endurance is your ability to be wrong... and still be able to try again. And again. And again.

Bedrock

Beyond Television

One of the joys of being human is we are in it together. When you're mapping out a path, you can look at what other people are doing. This is where social capital kicks in. Being surrounded by people that you share enough in common with to believe their paths are paths open to you. You can see the skills that they need to do what they do. If you know them well enough, you can ask questions. Ideally, you want a holistic sense of the person. To know beyond the stories you attach to the job, or what you have seen on television. What is their actual day-to-day? In practical terms, what does the person do? Every week? On TV, you might see the exciting bits of law, with time-lapses of them spending all night for months in a room with a box of files. If you know someone, you see the journey, and the consequences of the job beyond the conspicuous. Subtle things like knowing their circle of friends and family. Their capacity for interests beyond work. Their health. Do they spend lots of time on spreadsheets? Do they write a lot? Do they read a lot? Are they mainly in meetings? What are their frustrations? How is their relationship with colleagues and bosses? What is the politics like? What are the barriers to entry and development?

The first mass-produced Television

Trees and Fruit

If you are able to build Capital, you have to internalise discipline. Because you *can* spend Capital. If you stop it working. If you turn it into cash. Then consume it. It depends on the story you tell yourself. You can look at money as trees and fruit. You can live off the fruit, but if you start cutting down trees, there is going to come a tipping point where sustainability comes into question. “No Money” will again be the enforcer of discipline. It is analogous to the planet and our natural resources. While we were growing, and while we were living hand-to-mouth, we have not adequately considered the sustainability of our environment. You have to think in a long-term fashion. Normal panic is, “I am not going to be okay at the end of the month.” It is a different type of worry you have when you change the way you look at money. You have to realise when “this is not sustainable”. You might have to change your habits even if you are okay for the next three to five years. Because you are not okay... for ever. And that worries you. That is an important worry to have. One that requires a change in the way you act. 

 

Framing your Decisions

I believe we all experience the world as a controlled hallucination. We take in information based on what we already know. Gradually building trust based on an elaborate story we build up to explain the responses we experience to the decisions we make. You can’t live without a story. Your story acts as the framework for what you want to do, and how you want to make decisions. You need to internalise and embody the disciplines you want to use to frame your decisions. The way a lot of people discipline themselves with money decisions is running out of money. When there is no money there, you can’t spend it. Which means most of us live hand-to-mouth. You cannot build space for autonomy and consent within your decision making that way. You will get stuck in a monthly cycle, or a weekly cycle, or whenever the money comes in. You get income dependence, where you get a job, and get paid, and that determines your standard of living. And there is no space. No extra. If you want something, you save specifically for it, buy it, and go back to zero. Never actually freeing yourself from the constraint of having nothing in the bank. That becomes your framework. 

"The Frame" Frida Kahlo

 

Broad Framing

Every day we are presented with choices. We have a set of eyes and ears, a nose, a tongue, a whole body of touch sensitive skin, a mind, and thousands of relationships. We are aware. We absorb information. We are conscious. We act. But we cannot keep everything in mind when we do. What we experience soaks deep. Influencing the embodied way in which some choices become automatic. Memories, beliefs, arguments, loved ones, goals and desires disappear from our peripheral vision. Still, we choose. In “Thinking, Fast and Slow”, Daniel Kahneman uses 'Narrow Framing' to describe the way we tend to see each decision in isolation. They become life defining in our mind. 'Broad Framing' incorporates the context of all the other decisions. 'If you need to take care of something, the worrying will make you less rather than more effective' says Tyler Cowen. Broadening the frame gives things their proper place and stills the waves of worry.

"The Frame" Frida Kahlo

Forced Decisions

Never be a forced buyer. Never be a forced seller.

Price is supply and demand. If you must buy something, no matter what the price, that is dangerous. That is no longer a consensual exchange. Consider walking away if a sliver of that possibility exists. If you can find a way to create breathing space. Detachment at that level can feel impossible. You might, correctly, feel that it is your most important decision. It is a difficult thing to sit with, but nothing is so important, that it is more important than everything else. Certainly, nothing with a price.

The reason to build buffers, the ability to endure, and practice detachment, is so that you do not get yourself into that corner. Poverty puts people in a corner. Poverty is a form of scarcity that reduces the available options, smothering empowered decision making.

"Unequal Marriage" Pukirev

A young girl forced to marry against her will

Due Dilligence

Due Diligence is the reasonable steps required to gather information before entering into an agreement or taking action. Looking before you cross the road. Price is not value. Price is a signal of supply and demand. If something is incredibly valuable to lots of people, but is abundant, its price will be low. Whether your skills and knowledge are valuable is not in question. Meritocracy is not based on ranking skills and knowledge, it is based on barriers to entry. A competitive advantage is not what you are good at. It is why others cannot do what you are doing, which keeps it in short supply. Choices have consequences. We do not live in isolation. When it comes to money, you have to do your due diligence. You make money through the conscious construction of a container. It is not about respect or worth. That is your personal practice of conquering the demons in your head and heart. Money making is solving problems for decision makers with money. It is not about you. It is doing what you have to do, so you can do what you want to do.

Look before you cross the road

Creating Meaning

How you define words matters. What do you mean? Meaning is revealed over time through what we pay attention to, and what relevance we attach. Through the meaning we create. The actions we take. I am a Commitmentphobe, or a Commitmentphile depending on how you define commitment. I believe in Broad Framing. That you need to pause, step back, and reflect on decisions in context. That everything is connected. I love dogs. I don’t own a dog. A dog is a commitment. Affecting holiday choices, times you wake up, cleanliness of the home, and various other things. They also give great cuddles, and I love cuddles. My preference for commitment is to things that I can keep the commitment to. Not in the moment. Not outside of my context. I believe in the long term. That small moments compound. Fully committed to this moment. But also, in how it is connected to the next. And the next. Choosing what we pay attention to. Remembering the connections. Building meaning over time. That’s what I mean by commitment.

Little Me and my Milligan