Friday, September 04, 2015

Juicy (Ruth)

Guest Post:

Ruth Forssman (De Beer) and I met at university in first year. I remember her partly as another friend Sarah's partner in crime. Unfortunately (for us) Ruth moved from the University of Cape Town to Jozi. No doubt we would have got to know each other much better. There are lots of people that pass by us in life for no other reason than the wind blows in a different direction. I can think of a few really good childhood buddies that moved on. Another one of mine, Grant, from when I was 10 also caught up with me because of the blog. Fast forward to me diving into happiness and learning and Ruth has been one of my biggest mojo deliverers. Unsolicited feedback that my writing is of benefit to someone is one of the great joys of my life. The world is huge and we are scattered, but we are getting better at staying connected to the people that matter to us.

by Ruth Forssman

So I signed-up to a life coach for a couple of sessions. Actually we met through your blog - I approached Patrick Madden after his guest post that resonated with me (about moral intelligence). In one of our first sessions he used the word “Juicy” to describe the stuff that I was telling him about my life and current circumstance, my stories essentially.

I like the word Juicy, it’s a word with so much texture.  I like texture too, I think life is better when it has more texture.  Maybe one’s life texture can be related back to the number of juicy stories you hold.  Many times I’ve wondered whether I have experienced a disproportionate number of “stories” in my life compared to the average (and others have remarked the same about me).  But I also think that it has something to do with one’s outlook on life and I think that I have a more sensitive “story filter”.  Moments that others may let go by unnoticed, maybe I scoop them up & squeeze out a little more “juice”.  Sometimes this is a good coping mechanism.  To stick your hand up & go: “WTF?” or “this is unique!”.  And if you can frame the situation, take a step back & see the humour, not take yourself too seriously, and then share it with others… it can be a fantastic healing & bonding experience.  Particularly when you become a parent, there are plenty of moments that need a count to 10 and a touch of humour so make it through OK.  If one had to filter my posts over the last 4 years in which I’ve had 2 kids, a popular word would likely be “Poo”!  But that’s not very juicy.

Those closest to me will know that my father has been the subject of many a juicy story of mine, but that these serve as an ointment that puts the ups & downs of our relationship in context.  He’s a special guy though, and he certainly knows the art of telling a juicy story himself.

So still along the lines of your recent theme of what is happiness? And to my comment of “being part of the fantasy, even for one brief moment” (in which I made reference to one of my all-time favourite movies: “Ferris Bueller’s Day Off”)  – An extension of this is that “happiness lies in squeezing out the juicy stories in life”

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