I want to trust people. My natural disposition is to give people the benefit of the doubt. I find if I assume the best intentions, then I can listen more closely to points they are making. If I get triggered by words, I normally try rein in my raging elephant, and after a few breaths assume they meant something different to what I think they meant. In an ideal world, I believe if you give people unconditional love the relationship will be stronger, because they won't have to fear you walking away. Unfortunately, the people closest to us are those who know how to hurt us most. Unconditional can be brutal. So occasionally, it is useful to 'Go Dark' and think of the worst case scenario. If you can gain comfort that you can survive that, that you can cope, then the darkness will not kill you. Then you can trust.