Creating Agreements

Freedom isn't the absence of rules. The absence of boundaries and constraints can end up being a constraint. It can stop you building. Rules are just agreements. Agreements that allow you to relax into something because you understand the game being played. One of the games we play is hiding our struggles. I think this is partly because we don't agree on rules for how to deal with struggles being shared. If someone shares their struggles, it is hard not to jump in with advice. In my experience, that is normally the last thing people want. Particularly if that advice comes with an obligation to be followed (don't ask for my feedback if you don't listen to it). I think we would benefit from more spaces where people are simply able to share their struggles. No advice requested. No response necessary. No pity. Just people dealing with the stuff that we need to deal with. Together.

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