Thursday, August 10, 2017

Trying Times

Social Media keeps us connected to each others lives, but only bits of it. I find it a great catalyst for real world interactions, and am a power user of other forms of staying in touch. Still, I am very aware of how we live our lives in parallel. There are bits we can't, or won't share, because they hit too close to home. We aren't sure if it is fair to share because others are involved. Does it breach 'the container of trust' we build by knowing more about people than the world does? Sharing everything can feel like a plea for help. Sometimes it is. There are lots of people who don't have support beyond this. There are communities building for the harder things like intimate relationships, deaths, break-ups, moving jobs, losing jobs, physical sickness and mental health issues. 

I am lucky. I do have a deep bench of support... so this is not a plea for help. My partner Gem & I have been trying for a child for a year and a half, and after various tests have found out that I have a very small probability of having a kid, from me, even through IVF. Not zero, but tiny. There are other options to become a family, and we are looking into it. We have support, but this is one of those things with no solution. It just is. I have been broody for years and it is something I have taken quite hard, despite being philosophical and stoic by nature. In going through this, I have learnt just how common this kind of challenge is. It feels really odd to tell people you are trying. As you do, you learn just how many other people struggle their way through the storm of human fertility.

It does feel weird being public about it, but there we go. If you are struggling too, know that you are not alone.
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