I am trying to think of a gender-neutral word for emasculated. Disempowered does not feel visceral enough, and disemboweled is, I admit, too extreme. I also do not like being infantilised or micro-managed. This distaste for hierarchy is not a dislike of rules. I really enjoy clear decision-making processes and agreements. A perhaps strange combination of a rule-abiding contrarian. Seeking permission sucks when you are the one who has done the work. I have no problem with other people making different decisions to me. What I like is space. Space to make imperfect choices, and space for others to see the world differently. Where accountability and authority live together, with honest acknowledgement that we are all making it up as we go along. A great part of being an adult, is tolerating and dealing with your own mess. Building your own process. Owning the fact that decisions have consequences. In positive and negative directions. Making agreements, and making decisions within those agreements.
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