Forrest in Forest

My dream when I “stopped working” in 2014 was not to do nothing. I just wanted to not have to think about how what I would do would make money. I also did not like my fate being in other people’s hands. In a pure meritocracy, everyone would line up on a theoretical starting line and the gun would go. In reality, there are plenty of gate keepers to opportunity. There is not a path you choose and then knuckle down and crack on. So washing your hands of that rubbish, and saying “I am done” had incredible appeal. Front loading the effort, then constraining expenses going forward. The problem with that idea is I do see myself as part of others. It does not help if I am not stressed, if others are stressed. Like the scene in Forrest Gump where he runs back into the forest (with one r) to rescue people. The idea of financial independence is an illusion. I celebrated stopping working for money as “Independence Days”, but the problem is we aren’t independent. We are interdependent. So even though I talk of financial security and stilling the waves of money anxiety, the reality is it is a process of practice. The struggle to still the waves will continue. Part of stilling is acceptance and perception. Stillness where you are, not where you are aiming for. Stillness within the chaos, not after the chaos.