Problems vs People

This post on Overcoming Bias talks about something we all (hopefully) work on but often aren't very good at.

A section made me `feel better' about the challenge...

This notion of separating the idea and the person is old hat to many economists, of course, who can smilingly shred each others theories without anyone ever imagining it was personal or getting defensive. But in many situations - with kids, in close relationships, when there is a power imbalance, when the issue lies close to someone's identity - academic detachment is less natural, and so this technique can help. While I find the economist's way quite natural in some situations (like work), in my home life I get defensive far more easily, even about minor topics.

There are a couple of things I have worked quite hard at in the work place but seem to be worse at when it comes to family, friends and personal relationships.

Things like empathising and not avoiding conflict.

An example... I find it very difficult to not get emotional/upset about people leaving South Africa for good. Whenever I hear friends/family talking about it, I struggle to be completely rational about it.